Last year I wrote a blog about the end of my teenage years, which to my surprise had people who I didn’t knew even read this thing come up to me and tell me that they enjoyed it. So leading up to my last big birthday before they get depressing (21) I thought I’d do a blog on some of my mates. To be quite honest 20 was a bit of a nothing age for me, but I have realized recently that it is a year to reflect and discover what kind of person I really am, and I say that with the least lamest intentions possible.

But anyway on assessing what type of person I am I have come to the conclusion that I am very much a bloke; My religion is football, I enjoy binge drinking, vote Labour, watch hardcore porn, my favorite authors are Nick Hornby and Brett Easton Ellis, my favorite actors are Paddy Consindine and Ray Winstone, favorite bands are Oasis, The Smiths and The Specials and my favorite songwriters are Morrissey and Neil Young, I have a flutter now and then and do enjoy the casual bit of drugs… If you put all that information into a search engine the first link will be ‘BLOKE’ which to be quite honest is a label I am quite happy with. I’m quite happy with the person that I’ve become, a few issues to deal with and several areas that need improving; I make excuses to buy booze, I pretty much give several bookmakers my money every weekend, I’m emotionally crippled and so very, very lazy, I’m knocking 21 and I’ve never had a proper bird, I’m far too angry for how easy I’ve got it and I really should take life a little more seriously then I already do. I could potentially be so much more then I am, but then again a lot of us have that issue init?


I have also recently conceded that the world is fucked and will end very soon. All the signs point to it, the planet is getting hotter, the world is getting over populated, and the oil is running out, economies are shrinking; the rainforest is failing at an alarming rate, there are bombs in the hands of idiots, and many different countries are plummeting into madness, also money is controlling absolutely everything. I have absolutely no faith for the future and I struggle to find any reason why I would possibly want to bring a child into this world to deal with the mess that my generation will eventually leave them to clean up, even if there is a world left at all.


But through my first 21 years on the planet I have been truly blessed with the discovery of some noticeably incredible people, 4 of which I would like to give a special shout out to. Now there are obviously several of my friends who don’t need mentioning in a blog to know how much I appreciate their patience with me; I live with one of them, I married another, he then ran off with another favorite person who was also my bridesmaids (which I found strangely pleasing), several down in Surrey who I don’t see as often as I like, a life long one who I really miss but I will let her dick around at university for now and I’m sure we will pick up from where we left off in a year or two, and then there’s that other guy who I met in a toilet, who gives me the feeling that know matter what happens we are going to be on this ride together for the whole way. There also the ones who stuck with me through them school years who I really don’t see as much as I should. Then there have been the inevitable friends that I have had to wave goodbye to, the ones from college that I spent many happy memories with, and the friends I have lost over things as petty as women and money, and to the rest who know who they are. And at the risk of sounding gay I would like to give a special shout out to four blokes who I have more of an admiration and respect for then simply a friendship with.

4 blokes with at least 10 years experience on me, and with this they have taught me a lot in their own particular way. I ‘spose I shall start with who I met first and that was of course Ian, who I met at the first Bangface weekender. He ploughed out of his room at 11 o’clock on a Saturday morning, said hello to everyone, then proceeded to make mojito’s for himself and everyone in the chalet for breakfast, there was around 8 of us in the chalet, so one for each person and 8 for himself. By the end of the weekend I had already given him the name ‘topshelf’ Ian. One of the main strengths I see in Ian is his attention to detail, precise organization and a constant touch of class. Take last years Glastonbury for example, on the lead up I was looking for a printers to print me a Bangface flag but none of them replied, Ian just whipped one up the night before, then when we got there I lost my wallet whilst walking around in the car park, I was awoken in the morning to Ian knocking on the car window waving my wallet in front of me, even on the way back he stayed awake in the car whilst I was nodding off at the wheel, got us to pull over and baught me a relentless and a sausage roll. This is just a short list of little acts of genius that make the geezer up. Even last year I was given the great honor of being invited to his wedding with his equally amazing wife Rosa, even then when I was supposed to head from the reception back to a hostel I was staying in, he chucked me the key to the spare room at the hotel they was staying in. He’s a true milkman of human kindness as well as a walking cocktail bar and at times evil genius.


The second in my list of outstanding contributors goes to a geezer who I always used to bump into at the toilets of the Electrowerkz, but then would get to know better through many after parties in Woodford, I am of course referring to the aptly named Big Scottish Dave. Purposely built for both partying and destruction, a chat in a pub with Dave is like having a conversation with a talking encyclopedia, anything from music to politics, activism, physics and history, Dave has enough knowledge of it to keep you drawn in for hours. However all this is eclipsed by the geezers casual acts of human decency. When me and Jem was moving house he took a day out to drive the van and help us get all of our stuff from each of our houses. The organizer of our Bangface chalet, supplier of booze and nos and never short of a laugh, he even cycled to and from Glastonbury from London. A journey I would never even dream of attempting. I’d imagine if I was ever to climb up a mountain Dave would probably carry me the last 10,000 feet and I’d probably end up doing it quicker. He tea bagged me once on my Birthday and the picture has become folklore. I retaliated at Glastonbury and pictures exist, but out of respect for the geezer the people who need to see have seen it, and I dont think it even exists anymore.... Unfortunatley


This then leads me onto the one and only James ‘Jean Simmons’ who I technically first met whilst in a K-hole in the casualty corner of the Electrowerkz but first properly met at around the same time I met Dave. Another machine built purposely for partying. The man who usually supplies the party treats and at times is also the most organized-disorganized person I know. You’re at a party and you need a particular lead or adapter for a lead, he’ll have it. You ever fancy a line, drop, bomb or smoke of something, he’ll sort you out. A well-spoken, artistic genius who has over the years introduced and recommended me endless amounts of books, music and films. I’ve ended up at many after parties with the geezer, and traveled the country attending many raves with him. He’s also been the director of many great trip movies I have had, and never fails at great hosting when we go on a pilgrimage down to his home in Portsmouth for a do. He’ll hate me for saying this, but James is a true English eccentric in every sense.


Finally there is Alan, the other half of another one of my favorite people (Dominick). I first met Alan at the Electrowerkz (appears to be a pattern emerging here) whilst thanks to Jean, I was grooving on one of the most mental trips I have ever experienced. At first I didn’t realise he was Dom’s fella and ended up being quite embarrassed of the bumbling incoherent mess I was. Alan has a bit of an Ian complex to him, they are quite similar in how constantly organized and quietly assertive they both are. Just like the 3 other blokes Alan enjoys his partying and never fails to generously supply the goods and I do often tease Alan on being such a classy bastard. A damn fine producer of music and bursting with general great ideas, I am actually quite chuffed Dom introduced me to such a gent and also like Ian, Alan has proved to me the rewards that come with hard work. All for of the blokes actually share similar traits. All genuinely modest in their talents, all incredibly selfless, all would go out of their way to complete a favor for someone, all 4 of them in their own rights are unsung genius’, and all 4 of them I hope to have some similarity to when I reach their stage in life. The four of them are examples of Gods different concept ideas, not necessarily meant for mass production but just examples of what the human race is capable of.


So there’s my tribute to 4 of the examples of my special select of people that I’ve been lucky enough to test the patience of. As for the rest of my mates… I’ve met quite a number of people in my 21 years in life, a lot of them are alright, most of them are dicks and I have had to trawl through a lot of shit to find the people I would consider a chosen family now. I sometimes even worry that I’m pushing my luck and often try to avoid having them question why they would possibly want to be associated with me just incase they end up buggering off. So despite my skepticism about the sinking ship that is the world I am pleased I’ve got a perfect crew to go down with. And I’m sure that when the apocalypse eventually comes, we will all be dancing in some field not giving a fuck about the impending doom that awaits us.
I do have plenty of goals to achieve now I have reached this stage in life. There are degrees to earn, careers to start, loves to discover, moments to get lost in, countries to travel to, instruments to master, languages to learn, friendships to form and a life to live. The best is yet to come really. But whatever happens I’m pretty sure it’s going to be one hell of a joy ride. So whether you’re with me all the way for it, or if our paths fork off somewhere along the way, enjoy yourself and if your buying mines a Guinness thanks.